Chapel Talk Archive
Christina Oelhafen '21
We all have that really fun uncle, right? The one that stirs the pot at Thanksgiving dinners or the one who makes little jabs at you during family gatherings. No, maybe not, that might be just a me thing. OK, well, I do. From a young age, my Uncle Jeff has been teaching my cousins, brother, and me life lessons, ones that I have never forgotten. These life lessons, however, are not what you might think. They are not like the basic “never give up” or “believe in yourself” sayings that we all have heard a million times. Rather, they are basic sayings but with a twist … a rhyming, magical, and catchy twist. My Uncle Jeff teaches us lessons like “suck it up, buttercup” or “when in doubt, don’t let it out.” While it may take a little more deciphering to figure out the meaning behind my uncle’s life lessons, they are so catchy that you will never forget them. Yes, they are simply funny little sayings, but I have come to find great meaning in his comedic rhymes. So, I will tell you my four favorite phrases and a few stories that have come from them to convince you that these phrases are worth remembering.
First, my personal favorite: “risk it for the biscuit.” Risk it for the biscuit essentially means to shoot your shot, be spontaneous, or be adventurous for a reward. For example, do the minute to win it during spirit week to win the McDonald’s feed, or, even more risky, cut the Circle in broad daylight to reduce your total walking distance by two. For those of you who know me, you know that I am no stranger to this saying. I am a sucker for the double-dog dare and, even more so, the triple-dog dare. I love to be adventurous and audacious even if the biscuit is just a smile from my friends or a memory that I can lock away for a rough day.
Now, for a more convincing story, let me take you back to December 11, 2017, a truly magical day for me. It was winter term during the two weeks [between Thanksgiving and Christmas], and talk of winter formal proposals filled the hallways. A friend and I were prepared to serenade two upper schoolboys at roll call when the plan began to fall apart. My friend was forced out of the plan when another Upper School boy asked her to formal, leaving me with a song and a man in mind, but no partner to sing with. After much deliberation and many practice runs in the dorm, I decided to take the stage alone. I decided to risk it for the biscuit. So, the next day, I stood in line to make my announcement, nervously waiting for my turn to propose. Every worst-case scenario ran through my head. What if I fell off the desk before I got to pop the big question? What if the music wasn’t loud enough and my voice was all too clear? What if he wasn’t even at roll call, or worse—what if he had already been proposed to that morning? Finally, it was my turn. I hopped onto the desk, my knees nearly buckling under me and I sang the most beautiful rendition of Jason Derulo’s “Marry Me” except instead of saying “will you marry me?” I said, “will you go to formal with me?” Very clever, I know. I sang the best I could sing, pitchy as ever, and proposed. I risked it for the biscuit and walked away with the formal date of my dreams, Paul Malone.
However, not all risks lead to a biscuit as great as Paul.
Sometimes, they end up being complete failures. In Third Form winter on February 22, 2018, green streamers floated from the forum ceiling and Mr. Maqubela donned his famous green jacket. It was Surprise Holiday, the best day of every term. This day in particular seemed to come at just the right time. The infamous Third Form pig practical was set for the next day and many of my peers were excited to have the entire day before [it] free to study. On the contrary, Alex, Lily K, and I had thought, “Psh, the pig practical? No, we don’t need to study for that all day. We only have Surprise Holiday once a term, so let’s go to Cambridge.” We boarded the bus at 9:30 a.m. and forgot all about our fetal pigs. We took hujis, got sweetgreen, and shopped until Lily K hit her debit card limit for the day. When we returned to campus, we went to the lab to study and then got a good night’s sleep before the pig practical. “Sleep the night before is what really matters,” we kept telling ourselves.
About a week later, I pulled my graded pig practical out of my mailbox to find a not-so-great grade written across the top. Sleep was evidently not all that mattered. Nevertheless, when I look back on my Third Form winter Surprise Holiday, I have no regrets. Although I didn’t get the grade I had hoped for on the practical, the memories and laughter on that Surprise Holiday were an even better biscuit.
It may not seem like much wisdom, but I guarantee that this wonderfully rhymed saying, risk it for the biscuit, is the key to your future fun and most cherished memories. So, I encourage you to risk it for the biscuit every once in a while. At Groton, school work and major commitments often seem to dictate our lives, so take moments to be risky. Propose to your formal date in the craziest fashion, bust out a bomb outfit on a random Tuesday, and always play Surprise Holiday roulette. I promise you, the memories that you will make from just a simple “risk it for the biscuit” mentality are enough to keep you smiling for a lifetime.
Next up, we have “better late than never.” In other words, it is never too late to do anything. I think that a lot of the time we tell ourselves that it is too late as a justification for giving up. Some of the best things in life, like friendships, just take a little bit of effort and are worth fighting for. So, let me tell you my most convincing “better late than never” story.
My friendship with Leah, my Third Form roommate, got off to a rocky start, to say the least. Our first interaction took place near the entrance of the Athletic Center. It was preseason, and Leah was heading out to practice with two other girls. “Hi! Are you Leah? I think we’re roommates,” I said, excited to meet my roomie for the first time. “Hey, yeah, I’m Leah,” she said as she continued to walk toward the soccer field. That was it. To be completely honest, after that first interaction and the first time I walked into our room only to be greeted by a stench of sweat and dirty cleats, I was not convinced that we would be friends.
Fast forward to December during the two weeks of school. The annual dorm Secret Santa was underway and, of course, I got the one and only Leah Pothel. Immediately I had an idea … money soap. For those of you who don’t know, money soap is soap with money inside of it, but the exciting part is finding out how much money will be inside. It could be one, five, ten, twenty, or one hundred dollars. Two days later, my perfect gift arrived in the mail. Alex, Leah, Lily K, and I were socializing in our room when Leah said that she had to go to the bathroom, aka the perfect time to place my gift. When she returned from the bathroom, she saw the gift and said, “What the heck is this! Haha! This person obviously does not know me. Are they trying to tell me that I smell? Haha!” I was rattled. I had no idea what to say. I responded with, “Haha—what even is that? I wonder who has you?” Leah proceeded to hate on my money soap while Lily, Alex, and I laughed until our stomachs hurt. Just before we left for Christmas break, I revealed myself as Leah’s Secret Santa and the rest is history.
Since our first interaction and our Secret Santa debacle, Leah and I have become the best of friends. She has been by my side for my happiest moments and for not one, not two, but three of my college rejections. Had I completely written Leah off after our first interaction, I would be without one of my best friends. Better a late start to the friendship than never. I encourage you to be open-minded, especially to people. As my fellow Second Form girls can attest to, I have changed considerably since I first stepped onto the Circle. As I have grown, I have formed new connections with people that truly make me happy. So, to the Second Form girls, thanks for not writing me off immediately. Never say that it is too late to do something because it is always better late than never.
“Fake it till you make it.” Say it a few times in your head. Really commit this one to memory because I think that it is the most important and valuable life lesson that my uncle has taught me. Fake it till you make it means that by telling yourself that you are confident, worthy, or positive, you eventually will be. I believe that you can will good things into existence. If you aren’t hopeful, think positively until you can see the bright side of things. If you don’t think you are good enough for something, tell yourself that you are worthy until you know that you are. Be confident, and if you don’t have confidence, then fake it until you really do.
Last summer, I found myself heavily relying on this phrase as I hiked up Rubicon Peak in Tahoe with Alex and her dad. It was a hot summer day, and Alex had chosen this particular hike because of the breathtaking views at the top. We started up the mountain each with one sixteen-ounce sparkling water. By the end of the first mile, half of my water was gone, but thankfully there were only 0.8 miles to the top. Little did we know that the last 0.8 miles would be almost completely vertical. Like, I’m talking using hands and feet to get up this mountain. After about 1.3 miles, Alex and I decided to take a “walk for fifteen seconds and then break for thirty seconds” strategy until we got to the top. Either the air was very thin or Alex and I were just really out of shape, but whatever the case, by mile 1.5, Alex and I were both out of water and extremely shlumped. Because Alex’s dad was about a hundred feet in front of us and insistent that we keep moving, I knew that I had to make it to the top. I harnessed my inner strength and told myself “I think I can I think I can I think I can” just as the Little Engine That Could used to say. Eventually, after telling Alex a million times that we could do it, we made it to the top of the mountain. It truly was an amazing view, although I could not enjoy it, as my legs were too weak and the dehydration had begun to set in. Now, I will not speak any further on the symptoms of my dehydration following the hike because it might be TMI, but I do want to stress the fact that Alex and I made it to the top. My body was telling me to quit and head back down the mountain, but it was the Little Engine That Could saying, “I think I can” that gave me the extra push that I needed.
Last but certainly not least, “give me a hug, ladybug.” As my time here at Groton comes to a close, I want to offer a hug, socially distanced of course, to the people that have made me happiest over the past few years. To my roomies, yes, all four of you, thanks for sticking with me through it all. When I am sad, I think back to the many memories that we have made and a smile always returns to my face. To the triple train, Alex and Jane, thank you for teaching me what hope and everlasting positivity look like. To my teachers over the last five years, you have taught me in ways that you will never know, and I am eternally grateful. Lastly, to mom, dad, Jack, and Henry, thank you for being my biggest cheerleaders and supporting me in everything I do. Sending love and hugs to you all in North Carolina and New Hampshire.
I want to close by leaving you with a quote from Rhonda Byrne, who has captured the essence of my chapel talk in her book The Secret. She says, “How do you get yourself to a point of believing? Start make-believing. Be like a child, and make-believe. Act as if you have it already. As you make-believe, you will begin to believe you have received.” So, be a child, risk it for the biscuit, will confidence into existence, and give hugs to all of your ladybugs.
Back
First, my personal favorite: “risk it for the biscuit.” Risk it for the biscuit essentially means to shoot your shot, be spontaneous, or be adventurous for a reward. For example, do the minute to win it during spirit week to win the McDonald’s feed, or, even more risky, cut the Circle in broad daylight to reduce your total walking distance by two. For those of you who know me, you know that I am no stranger to this saying. I am a sucker for the double-dog dare and, even more so, the triple-dog dare. I love to be adventurous and audacious even if the biscuit is just a smile from my friends or a memory that I can lock away for a rough day.
Now, for a more convincing story, let me take you back to December 11, 2017, a truly magical day for me. It was winter term during the two weeks [between Thanksgiving and Christmas], and talk of winter formal proposals filled the hallways. A friend and I were prepared to serenade two upper schoolboys at roll call when the plan began to fall apart. My friend was forced out of the plan when another Upper School boy asked her to formal, leaving me with a song and a man in mind, but no partner to sing with. After much deliberation and many practice runs in the dorm, I decided to take the stage alone. I decided to risk it for the biscuit. So, the next day, I stood in line to make my announcement, nervously waiting for my turn to propose. Every worst-case scenario ran through my head. What if I fell off the desk before I got to pop the big question? What if the music wasn’t loud enough and my voice was all too clear? What if he wasn’t even at roll call, or worse—what if he had already been proposed to that morning? Finally, it was my turn. I hopped onto the desk, my knees nearly buckling under me and I sang the most beautiful rendition of Jason Derulo’s “Marry Me” except instead of saying “will you marry me?” I said, “will you go to formal with me?” Very clever, I know. I sang the best I could sing, pitchy as ever, and proposed. I risked it for the biscuit and walked away with the formal date of my dreams, Paul Malone.
However, not all risks lead to a biscuit as great as Paul.
Sometimes, they end up being complete failures. In Third Form winter on February 22, 2018, green streamers floated from the forum ceiling and Mr. Maqubela donned his famous green jacket. It was Surprise Holiday, the best day of every term. This day in particular seemed to come at just the right time. The infamous Third Form pig practical was set for the next day and many of my peers were excited to have the entire day before [it] free to study. On the contrary, Alex, Lily K, and I had thought, “Psh, the pig practical? No, we don’t need to study for that all day. We only have Surprise Holiday once a term, so let’s go to Cambridge.” We boarded the bus at 9:30 a.m. and forgot all about our fetal pigs. We took hujis, got sweetgreen, and shopped until Lily K hit her debit card limit for the day. When we returned to campus, we went to the lab to study and then got a good night’s sleep before the pig practical. “Sleep the night before is what really matters,” we kept telling ourselves.
About a week later, I pulled my graded pig practical out of my mailbox to find a not-so-great grade written across the top. Sleep was evidently not all that mattered. Nevertheless, when I look back on my Third Form winter Surprise Holiday, I have no regrets. Although I didn’t get the grade I had hoped for on the practical, the memories and laughter on that Surprise Holiday were an even better biscuit.
It may not seem like much wisdom, but I guarantee that this wonderfully rhymed saying, risk it for the biscuit, is the key to your future fun and most cherished memories. So, I encourage you to risk it for the biscuit every once in a while. At Groton, school work and major commitments often seem to dictate our lives, so take moments to be risky. Propose to your formal date in the craziest fashion, bust out a bomb outfit on a random Tuesday, and always play Surprise Holiday roulette. I promise you, the memories that you will make from just a simple “risk it for the biscuit” mentality are enough to keep you smiling for a lifetime.
Next up, we have “better late than never.” In other words, it is never too late to do anything. I think that a lot of the time we tell ourselves that it is too late as a justification for giving up. Some of the best things in life, like friendships, just take a little bit of effort and are worth fighting for. So, let me tell you my most convincing “better late than never” story.
My friendship with Leah, my Third Form roommate, got off to a rocky start, to say the least. Our first interaction took place near the entrance of the Athletic Center. It was preseason, and Leah was heading out to practice with two other girls. “Hi! Are you Leah? I think we’re roommates,” I said, excited to meet my roomie for the first time. “Hey, yeah, I’m Leah,” she said as she continued to walk toward the soccer field. That was it. To be completely honest, after that first interaction and the first time I walked into our room only to be greeted by a stench of sweat and dirty cleats, I was not convinced that we would be friends.
Fast forward to December during the two weeks of school. The annual dorm Secret Santa was underway and, of course, I got the one and only Leah Pothel. Immediately I had an idea … money soap. For those of you who don’t know, money soap is soap with money inside of it, but the exciting part is finding out how much money will be inside. It could be one, five, ten, twenty, or one hundred dollars. Two days later, my perfect gift arrived in the mail. Alex, Leah, Lily K, and I were socializing in our room when Leah said that she had to go to the bathroom, aka the perfect time to place my gift. When she returned from the bathroom, she saw the gift and said, “What the heck is this! Haha! This person obviously does not know me. Are they trying to tell me that I smell? Haha!” I was rattled. I had no idea what to say. I responded with, “Haha—what even is that? I wonder who has you?” Leah proceeded to hate on my money soap while Lily, Alex, and I laughed until our stomachs hurt. Just before we left for Christmas break, I revealed myself as Leah’s Secret Santa and the rest is history.
Since our first interaction and our Secret Santa debacle, Leah and I have become the best of friends. She has been by my side for my happiest moments and for not one, not two, but three of my college rejections. Had I completely written Leah off after our first interaction, I would be without one of my best friends. Better a late start to the friendship than never. I encourage you to be open-minded, especially to people. As my fellow Second Form girls can attest to, I have changed considerably since I first stepped onto the Circle. As I have grown, I have formed new connections with people that truly make me happy. So, to the Second Form girls, thanks for not writing me off immediately. Never say that it is too late to do something because it is always better late than never.
“Fake it till you make it.” Say it a few times in your head. Really commit this one to memory because I think that it is the most important and valuable life lesson that my uncle has taught me. Fake it till you make it means that by telling yourself that you are confident, worthy, or positive, you eventually will be. I believe that you can will good things into existence. If you aren’t hopeful, think positively until you can see the bright side of things. If you don’t think you are good enough for something, tell yourself that you are worthy until you know that you are. Be confident, and if you don’t have confidence, then fake it until you really do.
Last summer, I found myself heavily relying on this phrase as I hiked up Rubicon Peak in Tahoe with Alex and her dad. It was a hot summer day, and Alex had chosen this particular hike because of the breathtaking views at the top. We started up the mountain each with one sixteen-ounce sparkling water. By the end of the first mile, half of my water was gone, but thankfully there were only 0.8 miles to the top. Little did we know that the last 0.8 miles would be almost completely vertical. Like, I’m talking using hands and feet to get up this mountain. After about 1.3 miles, Alex and I decided to take a “walk for fifteen seconds and then break for thirty seconds” strategy until we got to the top. Either the air was very thin or Alex and I were just really out of shape, but whatever the case, by mile 1.5, Alex and I were both out of water and extremely shlumped. Because Alex’s dad was about a hundred feet in front of us and insistent that we keep moving, I knew that I had to make it to the top. I harnessed my inner strength and told myself “I think I can I think I can I think I can” just as the Little Engine That Could used to say. Eventually, after telling Alex a million times that we could do it, we made it to the top of the mountain. It truly was an amazing view, although I could not enjoy it, as my legs were too weak and the dehydration had begun to set in. Now, I will not speak any further on the symptoms of my dehydration following the hike because it might be TMI, but I do want to stress the fact that Alex and I made it to the top. My body was telling me to quit and head back down the mountain, but it was the Little Engine That Could saying, “I think I can” that gave me the extra push that I needed.
Last but certainly not least, “give me a hug, ladybug.” As my time here at Groton comes to a close, I want to offer a hug, socially distanced of course, to the people that have made me happiest over the past few years. To my roomies, yes, all four of you, thanks for sticking with me through it all. When I am sad, I think back to the many memories that we have made and a smile always returns to my face. To the triple train, Alex and Jane, thank you for teaching me what hope and everlasting positivity look like. To my teachers over the last five years, you have taught me in ways that you will never know, and I am eternally grateful. Lastly, to mom, dad, Jack, and Henry, thank you for being my biggest cheerleaders and supporting me in everything I do. Sending love and hugs to you all in North Carolina and New Hampshire.
I want to close by leaving you with a quote from Rhonda Byrne, who has captured the essence of my chapel talk in her book The Secret. She says, “How do you get yourself to a point of believing? Start make-believing. Be like a child, and make-believe. Act as if you have it already. As you make-believe, you will begin to believe you have received.” So, be a child, risk it for the biscuit, will confidence into existence, and give hugs to all of your ladybugs.
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